


Mobile Charger

by Dugamar (Coolneo123)



Series: Alcor vs. The US Military [1]
Category: Alternate Universe - Transcendence - Fandom, Gravity Falls
Genre: Alcor Being an Asshole, Alternate Universe - Transcendence (Gravity Falls), Becuase this AU Needs Those, John Being an Asshole, Military Training, Orphaned, Probably murder, Soul-based Laser Weapons, War
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-03
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-23 07:32:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11985144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coolneo123/pseuds/Dugamar
Summary: "Well, I have minutes before what will certainly be my untimely demise, and there should be another side to this story.To my story.A side that isn't laid out by those high-horsed cock-suckers.So here we go, I guess."Or, Pvt. John Nolan is roped into becoming a walking battery for a demon.





	1. Log Entry: Day 1

**Author's Note:**

> What the hell am I doing? I guess I'm part of this AU now? Whelp, here I am. 
> 
> Comments and criticism are welcome!

Log Transcript 1  
Pvt. John Nolan   
July 8, 2031   
  
Log Entry: Day One-1 

  
Hycan says I should be keeping this damn diary, something about "keeping morale up in the days ahead". I think it's a bunch of malarkey, but what do I know, I'm only going to be confronting one of the most powerful beings known to man.

 

This is bound to turn out fine.

  
  
Obviously.

  
  
Nothing can possibly go wrong.

  
  
Holy fuck, literally anything can go wrong.

 

Who's fucking idea was this?

  
Well, I have minutes before what will certainly be my untimely demise, and there should be another side to this story.

  
To my story.

  
A side that isn't laid out by those high-horsed cock-suckers.

  
So here we go, I guess.

  
My name is John Nolan, I was born in Wilmington Delaware on October fifth, 2014.

  
Times were different back then, or so I've been told.

  
Allegedly, there were significantly fewer demons threatening to decimate the nation in those days.

  
But I digress.

  
This little sob-story of mine starts back in the winter of 2028. The Fire Department officially claims that the inferno that demolished three square city blocks was due to a gas leak.

  
Pardon my doubts, when it comes to the 'official story'.

 

For now seemingly obvious reasons, I was the only one to be “miraculously saved” from the aforementioned inferno.

 

I floated around Child Services for a few months before being permanently placed into a government funded orphanage just outside of Fairfax.

 

It was a decent place to grow up, all things considered. Though, looking back on it, the place might as well have been one big propaganda machine.

 

It was during my stay that I was  ~~coerced~~ encouraged to join the US Army Cadets.

 

“It'll be a good learning experience” they said.

 

“You'll have fun” they said.

 

“You have opportunities in the army” they said.

 

I sincerely doubt that these “opportunities” originally included confronting a goddamned being of unholy darkness and evil.

 

Speaking of which it's about time I do the aforementioned confronting. If there's a distinct lack of a second log entry, you can probably put the pieces together.

 

Wish me luck, I guess.

 

Here goes nothing.

 

____________________________________

  


To: The Joint Chiefs of the Department of Demonic Experimentation  
  
July 08, 2031   
Non-release #64337429374

CONFIDENTIAL

 

Operation attempt 1b23d was a shocking success. The candidate, Pvt. Nolan, not only remained conscious while interfacing with the S12b6, he was able to communicate with the Subject vocally.

 

Dr. Hycan postulates that this is likely due to the abnormally high amount of “Soul Energy” that Pvt. Nolan is capable of wielding.

 

Unlike our previous attempts, all equipment seems to have remained virtually undamaged. Though Pvt. Nolan reported a “tingling in the air” after de-harnessing.

 

Obviously, this success has forwarded the cause of our department by leaps and bounds. We are expecting an increase in funding worthy of these results.

 

Brigadier General,

Michael Bryant

 

____________________________________

  


Log Entry: Day One-2

 

Holy fuck.

 

I'm not dead.

 

This day is turning out better than I could've expected. Mainly with the whole ‘not dying’ thing, but still.

 

I talked to a fucking demon, to an eldritch horror, and it didn't even kill me!

 

That definitely speaks to a “good day” attitude.

 

I think I need something to drink, something hard. Something _very_  hard.

 

The demon called itself “Alcor”, and while I hadn't heard the name till then, a quick search on the base’s intranet gave back hundreds of documents.

 

Homework for tonight: find out who the hell I'm dealing with, because the Brig isn't giving me any answers.

 

I'll write more tomorrow.

 

John Nolan, signing out.

____________________________________

End of Log Transcript 1


	2. Log Transcript 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which John discusses "technomagic".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually updated this. Holy shit. 
> 
> John is actually really fun to write, he's such a snarky asshole.

Log Transcript 2  
Pvt. John Nolan   
July 9, 2031   
  
Log Entry: Day Two

 

I managed to finish my little ‘homework assignment’ last night, and the results aren't necessarily reassuring.

 

And by that I mean that I've firmly categorized myself as “Totally Boned”.

 

This thing has a kill count numbering in the _tens of_ _thousands_.

 

Just last month, it annihilated a cult of over a hundred people.

 

I guess I should be glad that all it did was talk, and not go on a rampage across the base.

 

On a different note, the S12b6, which I'll be calling the ‘Soul Sucker’ for all you laymen who might be reading this, managed to keep me alive while the demon “sampled the frequency and resonance of my soul”.

 

In other words, it tasted me like a fine wine.

 

In all fairness to the demon, it _was_ part of the deal. Or at least, the early negotiations.

 

For the aforementioned laymen, I should probably explain why we're negotiating with a nightmarish creature of unimaginable horror.

 

According to Dr. Hycan, this debacle started a few years back when some yahoo realised that human souls are capable of generating electricity.

 

That's where the Soul Sucker comes in. The doc tried explain to me how it works, but that technomagic mumbo-jumbo just goes in one ear and out the other.

 

Anyway, the original plan was to use the excess energy that souls naturally radiate to power massive super weapons.

 

Or something along those lines, the specifics are still classified, and are way above my payroll.

 

Unfortunately for those ‘test candidates’, trying to rip the soul out of a living person and use it like a like a glorified electrical outlet tends to result in fatality.

 

Which is where I come in.

 

Allegedly, most souls produce the electrical equivalent of about 2 GWH.

 

I'm told that this is a lot.

 

I, on the other hand, produce an “unprecedented 3.8 GWH”.

 

That excess energy being the main contributor to the “John Isn't Fucking Dead” fund.

  


However, my electrical output alone isn't nearly enough to power anything larger than what's already in our arsenal.

 

As you've probably gleamed, the plan has changed a bit.

 

Which is where _it_ comes in.

 

The new operational goal is to be the first nation to successfully “enlist” a demon who won't promptly stab them in the back.

 

The higher-ups, being the free thinking radicals that they are, created an alphabetical list of every major demon they could think of and intended to negotiate with them one-by-one.

 

It's painfully obvious that they hadn't expected my first attempt to be as successful as it was.

 

The new plan is pretty simple, really. Just offer about half of my soul's energy to this demon as a sort of paycheck for aiding national security.

 

No big deal.

 

No problem at all.

 

Needless to say, I vehemently protested this plan of action.

 

At least, until they mentioned the seven-digit number that would be stamped onto my paycheck.

 

If I can make it the next four years without dying, I'll be set for the rest of my life.

 

Well, I should probably get some shut-eye, big day tomorrow. Assuming the negotiations go as planned, Battery Duty starts at 0900 hours.

 

John Nolan, signing out.

____________________________________

  
End of Transcript 2


	3. Log Transcript 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops, turns out writing isn't easy. Jokes on me I guess :P

Log Transcript 3   
Pvt. John Nolan   
July 10, 2031

 

Log Entry: Day Three

 

It’s been a long fucking day.

 

During introductions, Alcor gave me a rat whose every orifice had been rearranged. 

 

He found this amusing, apparently. 

 

**_It was hilarious, and your reaction was priceless._ **

 

He’s also dicking around with the log entries. And no, I can’t delete them, believe me I've tried. 

 

**_:)_ **

 

Asshole. 

 

Anyway, the negotiations went well enough. The only additional demand that he made was an “Unlimited snack fund”. 

 

I can't help but feel like Uncle Sam’s going to regret taking him up on that. 

 

**_Trust me, he will._ **

 

Now I'm stuck with this little shit. 

 

Luckily the terms were pretty rigid, so I  _ probably _ won't end up dead. 

 

This is the government we're talking about. 

 

Take that as you will. 

 

Wait a second-

 

Is that a fucking pushcart?

 

He  _ filled _ it with candy. 

 

Shit, I have to take care of this, I'll talk more tomorrow.

 

John Nolan, signing out.

 

____________________________________

  
  


To: The Joint Chiefs of the Department of Demonic Experimentation   
  
July 10, 2031   
Non-release #64337429836

CONFIDENTIAL 

 

The negotiations with the entity were, as all of my sector's operations have been, a huge success. Not only have we managed to successfully bring the demon to terms, the terms requested were well-within the bounds of feasibility for our department. 

 

I won't go through the trouble of boring you with the specifics. Our lawyers have likely already done so. Instead, I'll elect to restate the terms as concisely as possible.

 

Essentially, the demonic entity known as ‘Alcor’ will actively participate in the removal of hostile supernatural forces which are classed rank S and above. As requested by the Council, Alcor will be placed outside of the military command structure, taking orders from only myself and the Joint Chiefs. 

 

In return for his services, Alcor will receive 47.4% of the energy generated by the volunteer, Pvt. John Nolan. In addition to this, Alcor requested an “Unlimited Snack Fund” to which we made it clear that such a fund could not be used to purchase anything unlawful, nevertheless we accepted this term.

 

Obviously, Alcor is barred from actively attempting to harm military personnel while under his contract.      

 

He has now taken up residence with Pvt. Nolan, and if the reports I’ve received are to be trusted, he seems to be keeping to his word. 

 

As alluded to previously, a bump in funding will be a necessity in the coming future. 

 

Brigadier General,

Michael Bryant

 

____________________________________

  
End of Log Transcript 3


End file.
